you are so dumb jokes Audiobooks

You will be known by the company you keep! Successfully steer your own life instead of having it determined by others, advises Tobias Beck in this German bestseller narrated in his pithy, to-the-point style. Tobias provides the coaching needed to liberate ourselves from chronic complainers. Killjoys, energy vampires, and chronic complainers. Everyone knows a Debbie Downer, moaning the whole day long because nothing ever goes right. The weather is miserable, it’s Monday, and to top it all off, the doughnut has a hole! Tobias shows us a way out: simply not to bother with such acquaintances at all. Positive thinking for peak performance. Polarizing, provocative and exaggerated, the Liberated® philosophy urges readers to free themselves from negative people in order to live successfully and authentically. With success factors based on 15 years of personal experience in the field of personality development and behavioral psychology, you’ll learn how to: Think in terms of chances and opportunities rather than problems and risks Motivate yourself, forge your own path, and let yourself be guided by your dreams and vision Seek out people who support you and who let you grow and move forward Amusing stories, funny illustrations, and proven techniques. With success stories that are as entertaining as they are instructive, this book is as easy to read as it is unconventional. Part workbook and part self-help and nonfiction, this narrative book includes funny comics to illustrate proven-to-work strategies. If you enjoyed books like The Four Agreements, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, The Empath’s Survival Guide, and The 5 Types of People Who Can Ruin Your Life, then you’ll love Unbox Your Life.

Being apart from the lady you like can be one of the difficult things you ever have to do. So how do you make sure that the girl misses you while you're gone? This e-book gives you up to 50 ways to make her miss you.<br><br>Tip number one. Minimize the amount of time you spend together If you want the girl to miss you when you're apart from one another, then you can't spend too much of your free time with her. You should hang out with her enough to make her see how awesome, fun, and interesting you are, but not so much that she starts to take you for granted or feels like you've run out of things to say to each other. Make an effort to see her once or twice a week, but ensure that she's not the only to-do on your social calendar, or she'll start to think that she can have you whenever she wants. Tip number two. Limit your phone time with her If you and the girl you are interested in talk on the phone, ensure that you keep your conversations relatively short so she doesn't assume you have nothing better to do than to talk to her all the time. You can talk to her to set up plans or to see how she's doing for some few minutes, but you shouldn't let the conversation drag on so long that you've run out of things to say. To keep her interested, you want her to feel like she can never run out of things to say to you once you meet. Don't tell her everything that you're thinking or everything that's happening in your life over the phone. Save some of it for when you actually meet her in-person.

Dead foods—devoid of any microscopic life—are causing us to feel sick, tired, and depressed. In A Gut Instinct: Conquer Your Sweet Tooth by Tuning Into Your Microbiome, Heather Wise takes you through her personal journey uncovering a hidden inner world of microflora that shapes our mood, physical health, sweet cravings, and even genes. Sweet Palate gives practical steps in rebalancing and healing our gut microbial balance to relieve stress, digestive upsets, inflammation, bloat, excess belly fat, and improve our mood. Wise offers a much sought after alternative to the complex world of fad diets and calorie counting in this easy, evidence-based guide for wellbeing. Rooted in scientific research and providing a number of healthy sweet fixes high in prebiotics and probiotic foods that support the growth of healthy gut flora, this book is a practical guide to help heal our relationship with food and tune into what our gut has been trying to tell us.

Bestselling author and renowned Zen teacher Steve Hagen penetrates the most essential and enduring questions at the heart of the Buddha's teachings: How can we see the world in each moment, rather than merely as what we think, hope, or fear it is? How can we base our actions on reality, rather than on the longing and loathing of our hearts and minds? How can we live lives that are wise, compassionate, and in tune with reality? And how can we separate the wisdom of Buddhism from the cultural trappings and misconceptions that have come to be associated with it? Drawing on down-to-earth examples from everyday life and stories from Buddhist teachers past and present, Hagen tackles these fundamental inquiries with his trademark lucid, straightforward prose. The newcomer to Buddhism will be inspired by this accessible and provocative introduction, and those more familiar with Buddhism will welcome this much needed hands-on guide to understanding what it truly means to be awake. By being challenged to question what we take for granted, we come to see the world as it truly is. Buddhism Is Not What You Think offers a profound and clear path to a life of joy and freedom.

A simple step-by-step guide that allows you to realistically apply the Law of Attraction to improve your life and achieve the next level of practical understanding. Why is it that we see very young people becoming millionaires these days? Or older athletes in the Olympics winning medals when people thought they didn’t have a chance? And how about former Senator Barack Obama running for president and being the first African American in US history to win the presidency when many thought it was impossible? It is because these individuals have learned how to use the Law of Attraction—they have learned how to believe something is possible, even while others don’t. Whether it is presidential elections, sports, or anything, for that matter, what we believe directly determines our destiny. In these pages, for the first time ever, you will find the Law of Attraction explained in a simple and practical manner. While so many other books claiming to explain the Law of Attraction have cajoled their readers with inspiring statements and complicated theorizing, this book will actually teach you how to apply it to your daily life. So, are you ready to start attracting good things into your life? You are only pages away from finding out the real secret ...

A critical resource for anyone with a cancer diagnosis. Written by a radiation oncologist and cancer researcher, Taking Charge of Cancer offers an insider’s guide to understanding and receiving the best treatment options, choosing the right medical team, and approaching this difficult time with knowledge and hope. Receiving a cancer diagnosis can be terrifying, and the first thing you probably want to know is: How am I going to survive this? Cancer care requires decisions from numerous professionals, delivering treatments that are potentially life-saving, but also potentially dangerous and life-threatening. The chances of cure and survival for any given patient depend on the expertise of the cancer team, and whether procedures are in place to ensure that cancer care is delivered properly. So, how can you make sure you choose the right treatment team and ensure the best chances of survival and long-term health after being diagnosed with cancer? Taking Charge of Cancer is a different type of book for cancer patients—one that goes beyond the cancer information that is currently available, allowing you to truly take control of your cancer treatment. You’ll learn how to obtain and understand medical records, and why these records are critical to your care. You’ll also find the tools you’ll need to determine if the recommendations made by doctors are in keeping with accepted treatment guidelines. You’ll discover how doctors use evidence to decide which treatments are best, as well as how doctors can become biased in their recommendations. And, most importantly, you’ll be able to evaluate whether surgery, radiation, or chemotherapy make the most sense in your specific case—and whether or not these serious treatments are being delivered effectively and safely according to the highest standards. Now that you’ve received a cancer diagnosis, it’s time to set a plan in motion for your recovery. This book will help you do just that—every step of the way.

As the foremost researcher in the area of correlating mindset with a variety of organizational learning factors, having performed a survey validation study of the Mindset Works, Inc. What’s My School Mindset? Survey and the Project for Educational Research That Scales (PERTS) academic mindset survey, the author has discovered links between the philosophical positions one holds and the theory of mind that describes what makes humans different from animals. This book proposes that the ability to recognize and respond to the differences between what we “see” and others “see” is the key reason for individuals, groups, and organizations to succeed or to fail. How we perceive differences and respond to them changes the way our brain develops and how our systems are designed. This book provides strategies for supporting continuous development and growth in individuals, in group dynamics, and in system/organizational development using the most current understanding and propositions of theories of mind. Our theories of physics are expanding through Newtonian, Classical, on to Quantum. Our technologies are expanding from simple tools, to industrialization, to digital information systems, and on to holographic imagery and virtual realities. Biological understandings have grown from magical beliefs about life, through static views of fixed DNA, to cloning, and the potential to regenerate organs and extend life. Our world is in need of an update on the social transformations occurring in human understanding that apply to addressing key issues of our day. This book revisits the concepts discussed in mindset theory and reframes it with a larger, more inclusive potential for understanding our world that empowers our ability for personal choice to improve our lives.

Millions of us have counted calories until we're blue in the face. We've cut fat, eaten less, and exercised more—and we're still heavier than we want to be. Or we lose the weight, only to see it creep back up. It's frustrating, discouraging, and unhealthy! In Sara Vance's The Perfect Metabolism Plan, you'll learn that this inability to stay at a healthy weight is not about willpower and it's not your fault! Your metabolism needs a reboot. When your metabolism is out of whack, your willpower, hunger hormones, insulin, and cravings all work against you. And you not only can't lose weight, you tend to feel foggy, sluggish, or generally unwell. But worry no more. The Perfect Metabolism Plan will show you how to reset and reboot your metabolism through 10 keys. You'll also find a bonus chapter of metabolism hacks, plus over 50 recipes and a workable plan for putting it all into action.

Intuition is the hot buzzword in business, but specific guidelines on how to trust your gut have been sorely lacking. Put Your Intuition to Work provides that missing link. Business is about making money, but it's also about making decisions. There are relatively small decisions, like when to call a meeting or which emails to answer quickly. Then there are the big decisions that can make or break a business--which product to launch, whom to hire, how to spend. Hard work, analytics, past successes, intelligence, and a great business plan aren't enough anymore. Many of us are scrambling to discover the path to success but have found instead that we've lost our way. Although many business leaders won't publicize it, intuition is a key part of their decision-making success. Put Your Intuition to Work offers numerous compelling stories from entrepreneurs and executives about how they successfully use intuition in their daily lives. It is an inspiring and practical guide to help you: Make successful decisions when you don't have all the facts. Tap into your passion as a personal source of guidance. Discover the many ways to listen to your "inner CEO."

Don’t let your inner critic get in the way of being confident! How to Like Yourselfoffers a quirky, inspiring, and practical guide to help you overcome feelings of self-criticism, improve self-esteem, and be the true star in your life. With all the pressures of school, friends, and dating, you’re especially vulnerable to low self-esteem in your teen years. But often, the biggest threat to your confidence is your own inner critic—whose unrelenting negativity can result in feelings of inadequacy, depression, and anxiety. This must-have guide offers real ways to help you fight back, be kind to yourself, and move forward with confidence. Inside, you’ll learn the importance of self-forgiveness, accepting your faults, and how to focus on the things that make you awesome! You’ll also learn strategies for defeating the dreaded ICK—the inner critic know-it-all who keeps knocking you down—and how to escape the common thought traps that hold you back from feeling good about yourself. This book unlocks the mystery of the most important relationship you will ever have—the one with yourself! So, get ready to find your true inner voice. A kinder, gentler one that will support you as you reach for your goals and create the fabulous life you were meant to live!