jokes are half meant Audiobooks

What happens when you mix an average American woman with a decidedly not average future King? I can tell you from experience—a whole lot of complications. You see, four months ago, my all-American sister, Kelsey, found out that she’s not actually my sister—she’s a princess of a country we’d never heard of. She begged me to come along when she was whisked off to her new palace, so here I am. An outsider who doesn’t fit in anywhere. Now that she’s settled, I should go back to my exciting new career in New York. I absolutely should not stay in a country where I got shot (long story), where I suck so badly at the national sport that I accidentally murdered the symbol of the monarchy in front of half the country, and—oh yeah—where I can’t stop ogling Kelsey’s actual brother. The Crown Prince. The man who has to marry a very important princess. (not me) The man who must create the next heir to the throne. (without me) The man I absolutely can never be with. (remember that long story?) The man who just gave me the best sex of my life… Did I mention that it’s complicated? Each book in the Sexy Misadventures of Royals series is STANDALONE: * The Princess Problem * Ruling the Princess * Tempting the Prince

A clear and utterly practical ninety-day program for discovering a new direction for your life—now completely revised and updated by the author! In Now What? pioneering life coach Laura Berman Fortgang shares the process that she has used to help hundreds of clients make major changes in their lives. Whether it’s moving on from a dead-end job, discovering an entirely new creative outlet, or answering the age-old question “What am I meant to do with my life?” this book provides a clear and practical ninety-day program that can help you make major changes in your life. This revised edition valuable insights into how to stoke change, including: Ten years of additional client experience; Reports from 500 coaches worldwide who have trained to use this material with clients; New stories and modern-day dilemmas addressed; QR codes and additional interactive materials. For anyone who feels drawn toward a life-changing move but is not sure exactly what to do or how to move forward, Now What? presents a concrete process for finding and pursuing a new path in life.

A cyborg soldier with one mission: To rescue an innocent girl from a vicious cult But in order to fulfill his duty, he must do the unthinkable. Can Rich and Kyrin find each other when they are lost in the Cult Compound? Unit 78, formerly Corporal Richard Hardgraves, is a Cyborg with a mission: to rescue the Admiral's daughter from the dreaded Tr'Low Cult on Beacon 5. The Tr'Lows have a prophesy that a half-metal man will come from the sky and father the perfect child on a chosen bride--Rich tells himself he will play the part just long enough to grab the girl and run. Kyrin Pierce is a Peace Keeper with IPKA--the Interstellar Peace Keeping Association. Lured to Beacon 5 by a fake call, she was captured and now she is being prepared for an unspeakable ceremony. She too plays into the Tr'Low prophecy because of her flame-red hair. As the priestesses of the cult inject her full of hormones to drive her wild with need, she has nearly given up hope of escape. Rich might be more metal than man but he still has a heart and when he sees what the Kyrin has been through, he aches for her pain. But in order to get her out of the Tr'Low compound, he must do the unthinkable...and give the cultists what they want by taking Kyrin in their public ceremony. Kyrin doesn't care that the man who has come for her is a cyborg, she only knows that her body needs him desperately. And after he rescues her, her heart needs him too. But Kyrin's father, Admiral Pierce, doesn't approve of his daughter loving a "metal monster." When he separates them and sends Kyrin to a hospital to take care of her "problem" can Rich rescue her again...in time to save their baby? Half man...half metal...all heart. The CyBRG series by Evangeline Anderson and Mina Carter.

Two deeply scarred souls struggle with forbidden feelings in this heartfelt second novel in the Nashville Sound series. Life has taught defenseman Bryant Taylor never to look back and never to get serious about a woman. His ill, pregnant wife died while he was off playing an away game, leaving him—and both their families—heartbroken. Jokes and puck bunnies are his style now, and he’s sticking to it. Gabriella Charbonnet has idolized her brother Emile since he rescued her from their violently abusive father when she was eleven—and he’s supported her ever since. He even agreed to play for the Sound so that she could apprentice as a pastry chef in nearby Beauford, Tennessee. When Bryant and Gabriella find themselves thrown together at a society fundraiser, sparks fly. But Gabriella wants nothing to do with hockey players, aside from her brother, who just so happens to be Bryant’s best friend. The first rule of the bro code? Don’t mess with sisters. There are plenty of reasons why starting a relationship would be all kinds of wrong, yet walking away from each other doesn’t prove to be as easy as they thought. Sensuality Level: Sensual

“Small town Colorado police detective Gemma Monroe is a human and fallible heroine I can't wait to meet again, and Littlejohn's prose is lyrical and gripping.”―Deborah Crombie In Emily Littlejohn's follow-up to her acclaimed debut Inherit the Bones , a twisted killer stalks his prey in the dead of winter. On a cold dark night in February, as a blizzard shrieks through Cedar Valley, police officer and new mother Gemma Monroe responds to an anonymous report of a prowler at the local private high school, The Valley Academy. In her idyllic Colorado small town, Gemma expects the call was just a prank by a bored teenager. But there in the snow lies the savaged body of a man whose presence in town was meant to be a secret. And a disturbing message left by his killer promises more death to come. This is only the beginning . . . Nothing is as it seems in Cedar Valley and stories, both fact and fiction, ensnare Gemma as her investigation moves from the halls of an elite academy to the forests that surround Cedar Valley. Against a backdrop of bleak winter weather, stymied by those who would lie to protect what is dearest to them, Gemma hunts a ruthless killer before he strikes again in A Season to Lie .

From Susannah Marren, author of A Palm Beach Wife , comes her next book set in the exclusive, glamorous world of Palm Beach. Marren follows two sisters as one offers the ultimate selfless act to the other, proving the very meaning of family in this novel of artifice and intrigue. Veronica and Simon Cutler and their dazzling adult daughters, Elodie and Aubrey, strike an enviable pose, the ultimate Palm Beach family. In a town where social aspirations, wealth and charm prevail – they are transcendent. While the sisters are polar opposites, they are fiercely loyal to one another. When Elodie receives the shocking news that she is no longer able to conceive a baby, she turns to Aubrey. Aubrey, a free spirit, isn’t interested in marriage or children, yet when her sister asks her to carry her child, she can’t say no, despite her mother’s warnings. And then one stupefying secret, meant to be buried forever, is unearthed and no one in the Cutler clan is able to turn back. As the family is shaken to their core, Aubrey and Elodie must realize their places in the world and the lives they want to lead. In the midst of the unforgiving opulence of Palm Beach, A Palm Beach Scandal is a story for our times. A captivating tale of discovery, sisterhood and love for others where you least expect it.

Lady Alice Chivers is done being controlled by her family. On the run from an arranged marriage, she needs a strong Highlander to escape. Only Philip MacGregor insists on sending her back to her pampered life, so she’ll just have to blackmail him instead. But now they find themselves in an accidental marriage, and soon they’re both playing a role that feels like it was meant to be real. Philip is cautious, in control, and in way over his head with his unexpected wife. She’s intense, spontaneous, and can’t follow an order to save her life. And he might be falling completely in love with her. However, her distractions endanger the lives of those he loves. Now he must somehow undo the damage that has been done, before his friends pay with their lives. Each book in the MacGregor Lairds series is STANDALONE: * How to Lose a Highlander * How to Ensnare a Highlander * How to Blackmail a Highlander * How to Forgive a Highlander

Relieve anxiety, fear, and worry for good! Fully revised and based in the latest research, this second edition of Coping with Anxiety includes the latest DSM updates and provides immediate, user-friendly, and effective strategies to stop anxiety at its source. If you suffer from anxiety, you may try to avoid the situations that cause you to feel uneasy. But avoidance isn’t the answer—and letting your fears and worries constantly hold you back will keep you from living the life you truly want. So, how can you learn to cope with your anxiety while it’s happening? In Coping with Anxiety, Second Edition, renowned anxiety expert and author of The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook, Edmund Bourne, offers a clinically proven, step-by-step program to help you overcome the physical, mental, and emotional symptoms of anxiety. The exercises in this book can be done in the moment, whenever you feel anxious, and will help you move past your fears and start living the life you were meant to live. Don’t let anxiety keep you one step behind. This book will show you how to face your fears, overcome panic when it happens, and take charge of your anxiety once and for all.

The first novel from award-winning author Gianfranco Calligarich to be published in English, Last Summer in the City is a witty and despairing classic of Italian literature. Biting, tragic, and endlessly quotable, this translated edition features an introductory appreciation from longtime fan New York Times bestselling author André Aciman. In a city smothering under the summer sun and an overdose of la dolce vita, Leo Gazarra spends his time in an alcoholic haze, bouncing between run-down hotels and the homes of his rich and well-educated friends, without whom he would probably starve. At thirty, he’s still drifting: between jobs that mean nothing to him, between human relationships both ephemeral and frayed. Everyone he knows wants to graduate, get married, get rich―but not him. He has no ambitions whatsoever. Rather than toil and spin, isn’t it better to submit to the alienation of the Eternal City, Rome, sometimes a cruel and indifferent mistress, sometimes sweet and sublime? There can be no half measures with her, either she’s the love of your life or you have to leave her. First discovered by Natalia Ginzburg, Last Summer in the City is a forgotten classic of Italian literature, a great novel of a stature similar to that of The Great Gatsby or The Catcher in the Rye. Gianfranco Calligarich’s enduring masterpiece has drawn comparisons to such writers as Truman Capote, Ernest Hemingway, and Jonathan Franzen and is here made available in English for the first time.

An exclusive society of the world's most powerful gentlemen. Nothing will get between them and the women they want. Hope Malloy is not intimidated by rich, powerful men. So when she's hired to find a bride for billionaire Rafe Sterling, she’s certain the assignment will be easy. Not only is he sexy and a renowned philanthropist, the man is heir to one of the country’s largest hotel fortunes. Who wouldn’t want to marry him? Rafe Sterling does not want a wife. Too bad it's the one thing he desperately needs. His father ran off with a woman half his age, and Rafe can't become permanent CEO of Sterling Worldwide unless he's married. When he’s ambushed by the competent matchmaker, he’s captivated by her intelligence and seductive innocence. All of a sudden, he is thinking about a future and having her under his complete and total command. Will she run when she discovers his deepest, darkest secrets and shocking, sensual demands?