funny things to say to people Audiobooks

"Run little she-wolf, as far as you can because if I ever catch you, your worst fucking nightmare will become your reality.” He whispered dangerously, his grip on me painfully tight.A smile curled the corner of my lips, and I raised an eyebrow, running the tip of my nail down his chiselled jaw challengingly.“Oh but you’re wrong Blue-Eyes because I am the stuff of nightmares, and I'm here to create hell in your life. Not scared, are we?”Icy blue eyes met my unblinking bright blue.“I'm warning you, don’t mess with me.” He growled.“Oh? But the thing is, I always do what I'm not supposed to.” -----Azura Rayne Westwood. Known for her devilish ways and wild personality, was the youngest child of the renown Westwood couple. From her days at the Academy, word of her antics spread far and fast, yet there was far more to the young nineteen-year-old woman. The skeletons of the past are never left buried, and life isn't all as carefree as Azura portrays it to be. When demons from her past begin to make life difficult, she ends up making an even bigger mistake. Spending a night of intense passion unknowingly with the infamous stone-hearted Leo Rossi, changing her life forever.When Leo finds out that the woman he bedded was from none other than one of the packs he resents the most, he turns away from her, but he forgot one very vital detail; Azura was no angel, and when you mess with the Westwood Devil, you're tied for life. In a journey of passion, fire, strength and rejection, who will triumph?The young girl with the heart of fire, or the Alpha who yields nothing but hatred and resentment?Follow me at author.muse on IG!

Cassandra Swann is about to find out. Because she and her sisters are 1/8th fairy--not enough to do any magic--just enough to get them a Fairy Godmother from hell whose reckless spells makes their lives miserable. When her older sister decides to take the FG to court, Cass gets caught in the crossfire. Hit by their godmother with a disastrous birthday wish, she is in danger of losing what she loves most--her ability to paint. Because the court is in the realm of the Fae, Cass and her sisters have a Court Appointed Elf who acts as their attorney slash bodyguard. But who ever heard of a 6 foot 4 muscular elf with coal-black hair and intense green eyes? Sparks fly the first minute Cass meets Jacobin O'Shea. She resents his high-handed ways and Jake thinks Cass is a spoiled human brat. But after he saves her from a soul-sucker and sees her art, things begin to change between them. But Cass's ability to paint is still screwed up. Every painting she attempts climbs off the canvas and makes trouble in the real world. When the Fae court assigns her a new Fairy Godmother, things get exponentially worse when her new wish multiplies her living art. To make matters even more difficult, Jake's ex-fiancée--a gorgeous, anorexiclly-thin fairy--has Cass in her crosshairs and is determined to ruin anything that might grow between them. And did we mention Cass's grandmother is going on disastrous dates that fill the house with Star Trek conventioneers, bikers, and nudists? It's a mess only magic could make...or fix. Will Cass and Jake ever get past their differences? Will Cass regain her ability to paint without every painting stepping off the canvas? (Really, Fairy Godmother?) And will Cass's grandmother find a man without burning down the house? You'll have to read Be Careful What You Wish For, the second book in the Swann Sisters Chronicles to find out.

A woman who struggles with infertility has given up on finding love A warrior who thinks he will never be able to bond a bride Thrown together on a mission where they must pretend to be Joined Mates Will their lie become a reality? Dr. Danielle Adams isn't looking for love. Health issues have rendered her unable to have kids and she has given up on finding a relationship. Instead, she's focusing her energy on her career as a Medical Anthropologist. She's excited for her next assignment--going to study a new group of humanoids with their own special brand of medicine. But when she receives an ancient love artifact that supposedly grants wishes about love, passion, and fertility, she can't help making a few wishes of her own. Not that they'll ever come true...Commander Bravik is a Hybrid Kindred--half Blood, half Beast and all business. He's also the Diplomat in charge of the first cultural visit to Soluu Four, home of the H'raken people. Rumors that they have incredible healing techniques that don't rely on medical technology have piqued the High Council's interest, so they are sending Bravik and a human woman he barely knows--Dr. Danielle Adams--to investigate. Everything is going well until they arrive on Soluu Four and find out they are expected to bring a mate. In order to avoid offending their hosts and ruining the mission, Danni pretends to be Bravick's bride. But to her surprise, the healing techniques she has come to study turn out to be sexual in nature. When her "husband," Bravik, is injured on the strange little planet, she is called upon to put her new skills to the test. Things are getting hot and heavy--can it be that Danni's wishes will come true after all?You'll have to read Healing her Patient to find out.

WARNING: WARNING: This book contains violence, explicit words, and sex. Some words that might not be liked by others. Reader's discretion is advised.Liam Hallows was a beast that everyone feared, ruthless, and filled with anger. He was born to torment his oppressors and hates the word mate or love. His ideal type is a one-night stand, fvcks and never to be heard of again.What happens when Liam had a one-night stand with a girl who he accidentally imprinted on, a mistake he dreads his entire life?Nicole Mallory, the perfect luna who was loved and adored by all except her mate. She was forced to watch her mate have s3x with different omegas as a punishment for being given to him as a source to pay her parent's debts.Too much pain and agony had her drinking in the bar and ending up in bed with a total stranger who wanted her but he was the same, exactly like his mate.Would Liam be able to win the heart of the girl he imprinted on or would she be able to tame the beast that is ready to devour her?

From paranormal romance author Bella Lore comes a collection of nine epic novellas, guaranteed to make your heart swoon and your jaw drop. In Book #1, BOUND TO THE ALPHA, Keira is madly in love with Troy, the gorgeous Alpha of her pack. The only problem: Keira is a lowly Omega, and he won’t pay any attention to her. In fact, he bullies her, along with everyone else. But one day everything changes, and Keira, after a mysterious encounter in the woods, might just find her fortune turned around. Can a lowly Omega hope for greatness? Will Keira find her true mate? Books #2-#9 in the series—DESIRED BY THE ALPHA, FALLING FOR THE ROGUE, MATED TO THE ALPHA, MY TRUE ALPHA, PROMISED TO THE ALPHA, THE ALPHA’S BRIDE, THE ALPHA’S DESIRE, and THE LUNA’S CHOICE—are now also available!

Born in the flames of Heaven’s wrath, he’s all things sinful and too dangerous to love. An immortal Guardian, Aethan has walked alone for millennia, trapped in a hell of his own. Until a feisty mortal crosses his path. A female he shouldn’t even look at, one who shakes the precarious foundations of all that he is, and one who’s determined to walk the edge of danger. All her life, Echo Carter wanted “normal”, an impossible feat given that she can see demons. Drawn back to the alleys of New York, she’s determined to hunt down the one responsible for the death of her friend. And no man, no matter how sexy, will stop her. Until she discovers a horrifying truth about herself, forcing her to turn to the one man she should avoid. Aethan. But when two stubborn wills collide, a dangerous passion ignites… As evil closes in, Aethan has to overcome his darkest fears and claim Echo as his. If he doesn't, he just could lose her to a far more sinister fate… *This is a re-edited version with an added epilogue.

Lucy thinks the huge Monstrum warrior, T’zaren is a grumpy stick-in-the-mud. T’zaren disapproves of the curvy little human female’s light-hearted view of life. But when they have to go on a mission together as Lady and manservant and T’zaren had to serve her in some extremely intimate ways, will they change their minds? And will T’zaren ever succeed in…Finding his Goddess? To find out you’ll have to read this Enemies to Lovers, Grump and Sunshine, Fake Dating, Hot Alien Warrior Romance! Is there anything worse than a grumpy man? What about a grumpy seven-foot-tall Monstrum warrior who seems to have no sense of humor at all? Lucy Heartwood doesn’t think so. She’s an optimist at heart with a bubbly personality and she’s not anxious to spend extended time with a stick-in-the-mud like T’zaren. Unfortunately, the huge Monstrum is going to be her protector on a mission to save the Monstrum Mother Ship. They must travel together to the stronghold of Lady Twi’linda—a Twainer who has the only supply of dimriel crystals, which the Mother Ship desperately needs. T’zaren doesn’t approve of Lucille—she’s not serious enough. But she makes the Sen Stripe along his spine flare like no other woman ever has, making her damn hard to resist. When he has to act like her manservant and “serve” her in every way on their mission, their strained relationship suddenly gets a lot more interesting. But when their hostess takes a turn towards evil and danger stalks them both, will he be able to save her? And will he ever succeed in…Finding his Goddess?

I've been called wild. Dirty. Untamed. I moved to the woods to get away from the bullsh*t of the city. People there don't understand a man like me. I work hard, and my hands are as calloused as my heart. And nothing’s gonna change that. Then I meet Harper. A storm brought her to my doorstep, and soon enough I take her in my arms. And on the floor. And on the table. And in the great outdoors. But this girl keeps running. She says she has a problem that a wild man like me can’t fix. But she’s wrong—I can be everything she needs. I just have to prove that to her. Dear Reader, TIMBER features an untamed man who takes a virgin. Please don't read if you're not ready for hot sex that will make you reach for that vibrator hidden under your pillow. If the batteries are out, your own hand will do. No shame, babycakes. Enjoy this steamy story! You deserve it.

A Bride ordered to kill her Husband Marries a Kindred warrior who loves her. Will she fulfill her mission to kill him? Or lose her heart to him instead? Read RAISED TO KILL to find out! All her life, Allara Ke'ta'nu has been raised and trained with one purpose in mind--to kill a member of the Kindred High Council and avenge the Blood Feud which has raged between her people, the Q'ess, and the Kindred for generations. But in order to do that, she must first get close enough to kill. And what better way to get close than to marry the enemy?Brand is a Beast Kindred who has just become a provisional member of the High Council. When the Q'ess announce they will end the Blood Feud with a marriage of one of their maidens to a Kindred warrior, he agrees to take her as a wife, since he is the only unmated member of the Council. What he doesn't expect is to fall in love...Raised on tales of Kindred cruelty, Allara believes that Brand will be rough with her on their wedding night. When, instead, he introduces her to the Kindred concept of the Claiming Period, a slow dance of seduction begins. Can Allara hold on to her sense of purpose and do her duty as mandated by her people? Or will she lose her heart to the gentle touch of her new husband? You'll have to read Raised to Kill to find out...

“I need her in a way that won’t take no for an answer.” JUDE When Catalina walks in the door, my heart stops. She’s my best friend’s little sister, Etta’s babysitter, and hot as hell. The timing is all wrong. She’s too young, lost, and doesn’t know what she wants. I have a baby and don’t need another person to take care of. But then I take her against the wall and she finds her way into my motherf*cking heart. The truth is, I’m the lost cause, and Catalina might be the one person who can save me. CATALINA I came to LA needing to escape an a-hole who was using me. Six months later I end up at Jude’s house. I’m a hot mess … but Jude? He’s hotter. And walking into his home, seeing that Etta’s mother skipped town, I realize I’m not the only mess around. It starts as a one-afternoon stand—two people craving connection. But it quickly becomes more. Trouble is, my past is catching up with me. We might not have forever—but we have today. ??SAINT JUDE is a full-length novel with a HEAT! Treat yourself, love!??